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4 Types of Senior Respect to Incorporate in Client Interactions

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Providing care to older adults can be a highly rewarding activity. Getting to know a senior and hearing his or her stories can illuminate your own life, clarify your values system—and even augment your sense of self.

But no one is free from biases. Society sometimes marginalizes older adults and trivializes their concerns. This can lead even well-intentioned care providers to adopt practices that appear disrespectful, such as disregarding a client’s wishes or denigrating her through word choices.

As a senior care professional, you are in the best position to personally bring dignity and respect into every interaction with a client. This behavior not only benefits the senior client but can help drive desired outcomes. According to Gambrill’s study “Casework: A Competency-Based Approach,” “The clients treated with respect will be more likely to freely discuss difficult topics, explore their own contributions, and involve themselves in a cooperative effort to achieve desired service outcomes.”

Research into how to effectively convey respect to senior clients is scarce, but one 2009 study examined the subject in some detail. Sung and Dunkle’s “How Social Workers Demonstrate Respect for Elderly Clients” , identified 12 ways caregivers can show respect for their clients.

As part of Home Instead, Inc.’s mission of Changing the Face of Aging® , we share four key practices based on Sung and Dunkle’s study that you can adopt to convey respect in every senior client encounter.

1. Words Matter: Showing Linguistic Respect

The way you speak to people matters. Word choices matter. Words can build an intimate relationship—or tear a person down.

When it comes to older adults, care providers can show respect by using specific forms of address that avoid endearments. For example, instead of calling a client “sweetie” or “dear,” consider addressing them with a title and their last name: “Mrs. Smith.” If you receive permission to address a senior by her first name, then feel free to do so.

Keep cultural differences in mind when addressing seniors. In some Asian cultures, for example, respect can be conveyed by addressing the senior by their role, such as ‘mother’ or ‘father,’ rather than by using their first name.

2. The Art of the Greeting: Salutatory Respect

In addition to the words you use when greeting a senior client, you should consider adopting specific body language that conveys your respect. Three ways to do this:

  • Rise when your client enters the room.
  • Shake your client’s hand each time you meet.
  • Maintain eye contact.

If you have previously received permission to greet your client in another manner, such as a hug, this can be a good way to foster trust and strengthen a bond in your professional relationship without being disrespectful.

Remember to honor cultural expectations in terms of gender interactions, physical contact and more. Educate yourself about these aspects of care before you meet with clients from different cultural or ethnic backgrounds.

3. I Hear You: Acquiescent Respect

To acquiesce means to accept, even if you must do so reluctantly. When a senior’s wishes and opinions get brushed aside by family members or care providers, the client may feel as if she doesn’t matter. Conversely, showing acquiescent respect can bolster a client’s sense of self-worth and engage her as a contributing member of the care team.

To demonstrate acquiescent respect to a senior client, you can listen closely to his or her wishes and opinions—and then honor them even if you disagree with them.

Acquiescent respect can be difficult for senior care professionals to practice when their own notion of what’s best for the client differs from the client’s viewpoint. But, in general, you should try to honor your client’s wishes instead of imposing your own beliefs and values on the client, unless the client’s wishes would be detrimental to her health.

For example, perhaps you believe a client would be better off moving to an assisted living facility, but she wants to remain in her home. Instead of pushing her to go along with your rationale, you can show your respect by trying to find a way to honor her wishes to age in place by arranging for a visiting nurse, professional in-home caregiver or other services to accomplish her objectives.

4. Dressed for Success: Presentational Respect

The way you present yourself—in dress and in manners—can profoundly communicate your respect for your older adult clients. As one social worker said in the study, “We need to dress in the way the client's culture says is appropriate to a helping professional.” This may mean wearing medical scrubs, a lab coat or a business suit, depending on your role in the caregiving continuum.

Your posture also forms the basis of presentational respect. When you present yourself as a caring professional by focusing your attention on your client, taking his hand, maintaining eye contact and asking him sincerely how you can help, you show you respect and value his involvement in the care process.

Practicing the four types of respect listed here can help you convey your esteem to the older adults you interact with. As a senior care professional, you are in an ideal position to help make a difference in the lives of the aging population in North America. Your demonstration of senior respect not only can increase your clients’ feelings of self-worth but can influence those around you to treat seniors with all the respect they deserve.

Last revised: May 3, 2016

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Thoughts and stories from others
  1. November 17, 2020 at 11:04 pm | Posted by Danny Piccinich

    thanks to the author for taking his clock time on this one.


  2. July 21, 2020 at 7:57 pm | Posted by Melina Schaaf

    Great to read


  3. January 24, 2018 at 9:01 pm | Posted by Lori Lin Bradshaw

    I just came back from visiting my two parents who are 3 months new to a retirement home. They pay is substantial amount of money to reside in this beautiful place. They have a suite with three windows. They've decided to construct a new wing on this facility and have put a 40 foot trailer in front of two of their windows and another trailer in front of their other window. They did not discuss any of this with my parents prior to locating the trailers in their only view of outside. I would consider this very disrespectful


  4. May 28, 2016 at 1:28 am | Posted by Judy Elliott

    I volunteer at an assisted living facility in my community. The activities director asked me to help her with a goal she had. She was frustrated that she had to get residents from their rooms for all of her activities. She established a social time at 2:30 on Mondays and asked me to contribute my gift for conversation. It didn't take long to discover that the residents weren't sure who else was a resident and who was a volunteer. They seldom knew names besides their own. I asked the office manager at the church I attend to make me a nametag in LARGE PRINT so that the residents could read it from a distance. It took little time for them to learn my name and begin to use it. It delighted me. I was working very hard to learn all of their names. That made me think of nametags for them. I asked the office manager to make nametags for them and I devoted myself to putting the nametags on them at each activity I participated in. Nametags that they can read seem to humanize others.


  5. May 26, 2016 at 5:26 pm | Posted by Robyn Young

    You made some excellent points. I would add to it, Tone of Voice. I cringe when I hear care givers talk to their senior clients in a high-pitch sing-song tone of voice. I find this disrespectful.


  6. May 12, 2016 at 9:46 am | Posted by Nancy Christ

    I do appreciate the referencing of language choices as it relates to using terms of endearment. It only seems appropriate to avoid "hon", "sweetie", etc., but it may be that doing so creates, for the care provider, a sense of friendly affection with the client. Nonetheless, it would seem disrespectful and condescending in most situations when there are other ways and words that can create a positive and supportive climate. It is quite a challenge and skill to be perceptive enough to know how to interact best with anyone...even over a period of time. Thank you.


    • May 27, 2016 at 9:16 am | Posted by Annette Isaksen

      Please also include: Miss Annette as a disrespectful term used primarily by Asian employees of Microsoft technical assistance or marketers. When asked to call me by my first name or Miss Isaksen, they have trouble Not saying Miss ...but do not refer to a male customer by "Mr Tom". Very condescending and sexist!


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